Trigger alert: Comparing self to computer.
Sometimes when my Mac has too many things going on at the same time I get the Spinning Beach Ball of Doom. I like it, actually, because, you know, twirly. On the other hand, it's not very useful, in terms of computing.
Sometimes it resolves itself, after a time. But there are also other times. These are the times I have to shut... the.... whole..... thing....... down. It was trying to do too much at once. Too much. This is temporary. The computer will reboot and be fine. But it needed a real rest.
So here is some more proof of my fabulous Theory of Mind™. I can feel for that little computer. I can relate to it right now. And I thought I should tell you all about it so you know why it has been a while since I have answered any questions on here even though some of you know I have got your questions in the hopper, and your questions are waiting, and you are waiting, and I am sorry about all of that.
Please be patient. For now I can barely write; it would shock you to know how long this little post is taking me. My talking has gotten more that sort of way it gets where I make up circumlocutions and 'interesting' ways of phrasing things and some charitable people decide to believe it is because I am witty instead of because I cannot try and try as I might with all my might I cannot remember the actual real word for "folder." My Spinning Beach Ball of Doom isn't resetting itself. It has become clear that I need to power down and think about polygons for a while, try to find some dapples to look at.
But I will be back soon because you can reboot the computer soon once you have made the commitment to shut it down properly.
Shutdown is related to meltdown, in terms of how much control we have over it, also sort of a lot of the causes maybe, but it looks different. However, really know it's not on purpose. Really know a shut down person is not ignoring or disrespecting you. Really know a shut down person, if that person is me, I should say, so I'm not being unduly universalizing, will be glad when rebooting is properly accomplished, will be there for you, and happy about it.
Thank you for listening.
Ib
(((((Ibby))))) love the "beachball of doom" picture. the word "beachball" in the same sentence with the word "doom" made me do a headshake (like the cartoon version of Whaaattt???). good, though. love you. see you on the reboot.
ReplyDeleteThank you Ibby. It was very informative
ReplyDeletei think is is very well written, and very relatable. just like the computer, it's important to take the time to properly shut down... just don't try to reboot too soon.
ReplyDeletetake the time - be well.
Dearest Ibby, Shut down... absolutely... I understand. You are so thoughtful to write this so eloquently (despite how long it may have taken) to tell all your readers that you need to do this for yourself. (((Ibby))) and there are countless hearts that go with that hug or as my son Nic would say "OOOOOO... infinity"
ReplyDeleteShut down friend. You have done so much work. Take care of yourself.
ReplyDeleteBeautifully and relatably put! Thank you Ibby.
ReplyDeleteSo well put. I always thought I was totally NT but I can really relate to this post. If I take on too much I can literally feel my brain shutting down bit by bit until I just stop.
ReplyDeletewhile you're having your rest I'm going to be re-reading some of your older posts as your insights into my son's mind are so helpful and well, insightful!
My favourite post so far was the one about the difference between a meltdown and a tantrum. I have quoted that one to all his support workers!! Thank you for taking the time to share with us.
Reboot soon xx
Tell our children to shut down so they can reboot. Despite being in bed for 30 minutes, I can clearly hear J saying "Babooey!" quite cheerfully, and B occasionally joining in with "Mmmg." I love you. Just so you know. xxxx
ReplyDeleteSending strong thoughts your way, Ibby. You wrote this so eloquently.
ReplyDeleteYes. Thank you for sharing your insights. Again, and always.
ReplyDeleteWell said, Ibby :D
ReplyDeleteNeurotypicals just don't understand the need for 'shut down' & 'reboot' of the ASD system. I have to do this regularly - yesterday was a good example. After a week of terrifying cyclone, floods, house damage & not being able to get the Bear (9yrs Aspi) across town to his new school (ASD Programs etc). I had too much, I couldn't function to do the simple stuff - make/take phone calls (ignore that flippin thing) ... I spent the day playing Candy Crush Saga, went to bed & unwound. I feel reasonably better today - but still need a few more days to fully 'reprogram'!
That is an analogy that I can really understand. No control over it. But entirely necessary to proceed.
ReplyDeleteI appreciate you and your words... and the effort you make to share both with such honesty. Thank you, Ibby
ReplyDelete((Hugs)) + spoons o--
Leah
((Many, many backups and motherboards to you, Ibby)). You have done a massive amount of good work. Take care of yourself.
ReplyDeleteShut down. You put out so much good into the world and continue to do so with this post. ((peace))
ReplyDelete<3 feel better
ReplyDeleteThank you for being brave and for taking care of yourself. You cannot help others if you aren't present, so Rah-rah and good on you!! Praying for the peace that passes all understanding to comfort your heart and mind! Sharee
ReplyDelete{Hugs}
ReplyDeleteYes. Exactly. This is what I'm doing come this weekend. (I tried it a couple of weekends ago, but it didn't work because a stressful situation was introduced on the Friday, and it got me worked up again....)
So I'll have 5 days to try to recover from the stresses of the last several months.
Here's hoping we'll both be successful!
{More Hugs}
:) tagAught
Your words made so much sense. Its so hard today to take a step back side ways or just sit down these days. Todays world is busy busy busy. New technology has made it so much easier to go go go. I wish more people understood their own beachball of doom.
ReplyDeleteI can relate. There's just times when you need everything to just stop for a while.
ReplyDelete